Don’t Forget to Play
Ivy Griffin
Do you remember how it felt when you did something you loved as a kid? Like, the kind of play that really used to light you up? The thing that you always looked forward to or daydreamed about?
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This blog is written by a therapist in midtown Sacramento and focuses on the concerns and struggles of highly sensitive people (HSPs) and of kids, teens and adults struggling with depression, anxiety or just trying to figure out what they want for themselves. There's help and hope through counseling and therapy!
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A Message to Caregivers
Ivy Griffin
So this message today is for all my caregivers, whether you are the adult child of an aging parent, someone who is helping their spouse through health issues, an aunt, uncle, grandparent, or even an older sibling who is looking out for a child.
Read More3 Tips to Better Attune to Yourself
Ivy Griffin
As HSPs, we’re often so highly attuned that we experience overwhelm due to a constant stream of emotional and sensory input. We pick up on body language, subtle changes or details in our environment, and the needs and emotions of others. For some of us, we’re also acutely aware of our own needs and emotions, but for others, this may be a struggle. How does it impact us when we receive lots of external input, but struggle to attune to ourselves? And how can better attuning to ourselves actually reduce some of the overwhelm we experience?
Read MoreCalming Reactivity
Ivy Griffin
“I just don't want to feel as much.”
“I don't want to be as easily upset by things.”
“I just want things to roll off my back.”
If you’ve ever experienced emotional overwhelm, flooding, or intense sadness or anger in response to something someone said or did, you might have experienced reactivity. These experiences can be a lot and they can make us worry that we are a lot. Because of the automatic nature of reactivity, it can feel as though change is impossible, but there is absolutely hope and things we can do to improve our coping skills.
Read MoreBefriending Our Shadows as HSPs
Ivy Griffin
As highly sensitive people (HSPs), we may know ourselves to be conscientious, thoughtful, empathic and attuned to others’ emotional states. We might also be aware that these qualities make us much less likely to treat others harshly. Thus, experiencing uncomfortable emotions like resentment or jealousy or learning that we’ve hurt someone’s feelings may be particularly difficult for us. We may even start to question ourselves, “How could I feel this way? What’s wrong with me?” Let’s dive a little deeper to learn why we might feel this way and how we can better understand ourselves.
Read MoreLiving with anxiety
Ivy Griffin
As highly sensitive people (HSPs), our brains and bodies stay on the alert, noticing all sorts of details about what’s happening around us. For myself and many HSPs I know, the line between being aware versus overly alert, on edge, and tense can sometimes be very thin.
Read MoreHow Long Before I'm Better? Thoughts on the Therapy Timeline
Ivy Griffin
“How long does therapy take to start working?” “I've been in therapy over a year, why do I still have the same issues?” “Will I need therapy the rest of my life?” These are important questions that deserve thoughtful consideration. Read on for insights from a therapist who has provided both short and long-term therapy.
Read MoreThe Power of Words: Self-poisoning with negativity
Ivy Griffin
We’ve all had moments where we’ve been less-than-kind to ourselves. We might have struggled to accomplish something and called ourselves either out loud or internally things like failure, lazy, stupid or even worthless. In the moment, it probably doesn’t feel like such a big deal, we might even feel like we deserve it, or we minimize and tell ourselves it isn’t so bad since we only did it once or twice. But the fact of the matter is that word choice is a powerful thing, and every time we direct harsh negativity towards ourselves we are essentially feeding ourselves poison.
Read MoreWhen Relaxation feels triggering: Hypervigilance and CEN
Ivy Griffin
“I want to relax but I feel constantly anxious, like the other shoe is about to drop.”
Hypervigilance can be draining and painful and sometimes makes us feel hopeless. We long for respite from the constant physical tension and the marathon of thoughts running through our heads. How do we swap our experiences of frequent anxiety and fleeting calm for more frequent calm and fleeting anxiety?
Read MoreFinding Your North Star: Communicating with Intention
Ivy Griffin
How many times in life have we attempted to have a serious conversation and felt like it derailed? How many times have we entered a discussion and feel baffled by how far from the original point the conversation has flowed? For many attempting to have a serious conversation where we communicate a grievance, concern or address a boundary can be nerve wracking if not anxiety inducing.
Read MoreSpeak Your Truth: Self-Advocating with Medical Professionals
Ivy Griffin
There can be so much anxiety when interacting with medical professionals. We wait weeks, maybe even months for an appointment, and the second we get in the room it can feel like all the air has left the space, and we might feel ourselves shrinking and pulling in. The second they start to speak it can feel like all our well grounded points and concerns were a house of cards and we have trouble asserting ourselves due to nerves or anxiety. For many this ends in deferring to the authority of the professional in the room, even if we don’t agree. When we leave we might be left feeling unheard, dissatisfied and sometimes even gaslit.
Read More3 Ways to Better Approach Change
Ivy Griffin
Change is hard. We've tried a million times to change in the past and it always works for a time before slowly reverting back to the way it was before. We feel tired, disappointed, and hopeless. “Why do I even try?” we ask ourselves. “There's got to be a better way”.
Read MoreFinding Sleep: Combating Rumination Part 2
Ivy Griffin
Pre-sleep rumination is a frustrating experience that has plagued most human beings. If you too find yourself struggling to fall asleep due to rumination (when we dwell on negative feelings and distress in a repetitive manner, heightening or exacerbating anxious and depressive feelings) you may find some of the following tips helpful.
Read MoreFinding Sleep: Combating Rumination Part 1
Ivy Griffin
Most of us have experienced that frustrating moment when no matter how hard we try to fall asleep we can’t seem to quiet the chatter in our minds, and it feels like all our stresses and fears hit us like a freight train. That chatter is often rumination, and it tends to hit us right when we are trying to fall asleep because we are finally still, and usually distraction free. Rumination is when we dwell on negative feelings and distress in a repetitive manner, which in turn heightens or exacerbates anxious and/or depressive feelings. For anyone familiar with anxiety and depression, rumination can quickly become a core component of the experience.
Read MoreGetting the Most Out of Coping Mechanisms
Ivy Griffin
If you’ve been in therapy before you might be familiar with the idea of coping skills and tools. They can include anything from deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation (PMR), journaling, tapping, and visualization-there are so many wonderful methods to support self regulation. But did you know that most coping skills and tools can be used both reactively and proactively?