1614 X St., Suite A
Sacramento, CA 95818
US
916-287-3430
ivy@thrivetherapyandcounseling.com
Thrive Therapy & Counseling provides high quality therapy to Highly Sensitive People and to kids, teens or adults struggling with anxiety, depression or self-esteem.
This blog is written by a therapist in midtown Sacramento and focuses on the concerns and struggles of highly sensitive people (HSPs) and of kids, teens and adults struggling with depression, anxiety or just trying to figure out what they want for themselves. There's help and hope through counseling and therapy!
We all are encountering varying levels of change and upheaval as we deal with COVID-19. Many of us are experiencing feelings of bewilderment, annoyance and frustration at people’s over-reactions or under-reactions, worries about the future, and stress and strain on our relationships.
Read MoreRest and downtime are essential for all humans, whether or not we get that message in our fast-paced, multi-tasking culture. No being can be focused, alert, and active all the time. Rest provides the yin to the yang of busyness. It offers us balance and restoration so that we can resume all that we need to do.
Read MoreA question I hear a lot from parents in the therapy room is, “Where do I draw the line?” Some things may be clear, but there’s a lot of nuance. Do I limit their screen time, and if so, how without starting WWIII? Do I monitor their social media? How much should I watch over their grades and hound them about homework, or do I let them face the consequences for themselves? What’s acceptable for them to wear, and should I dictate clothing choices? Is any alcohol or drug use okay? What about sex?
Read MoreAre you ever challenged to find things you are thankful for? I know I sometimes struggle with this. It can be hard to pinpoint the good in life when your mind is swimming with to do lists, hurt feelings, and self-doubt. On top of that, highly sensitive people are often inundated with stimuli, which can feel really overwhelming. And, if you’re already feeling down, it can be hard and even annoying to focus on gratitude. Writing a list of 3-5 things you are thankful for might even seem to trivialize and minimize the intensity of your emotions. But despite these challenges, I want to encourage HSPs to give the practice of gratitude a try. Why?
Read MoreThe teenage years can be a roller coaster for teens and parents alike. The surge of hormones and changes in body chemistry can cause teens’ moods to fluctuate from calm to sad to irate in a matter of minutes, which can leave everyone--your teen included--feeling overwhelmed and baffled. Add these ups and downs to the impulsivity teens have and their lack of life experience, and sometimes it can make for a scary combination.
Read MoreSince the start of the New Year, I’ve been noticing a lot of ads for exercise equipment and diets promising to help you shed those holiday pounds. This is a prime selling time for these types of goods and services as we may have overindulged over the holidays. I’m not a fan of exercise and diet fads as they tend to play off of people’s insecurities and sometimes perpetuate unhealthy and unrealistic ideals. This is why I am more apt to recommend a media diet which may help you to achieve a different type of health and wellness.
Read MoreAs highly sensitive people (HSPs), we tend to question ourselves a lot. We think and wonder and analyze. Is this the best job for me? Am I happy? Am I a good parent/sibling/friend/partner/colleague? What’s the meaning of life? And of my life, in particular? Should I be doing _____ more? Am I with the right partner? Is this how I want to act with my family? Should I be doing things differently? Am I on the right track with my life??
Read MoreTeens have a lot of pressure on them these days. They’re a generation that’s more “on” and connected than ever before. They can feel pressure from friends and peers to constantly be available online and responding to messages (or risk missing out on important social happenings), they may feel the stress of navigating AP classes or taking college classes in conjunction with their regular high school coursework, and many teens can fixate on worrying about their SAT/ACT scores, GPAs, extra-curriculars, athletics, and what all of those mean for what colleges they will get into. Many teens believe that making the “right” decisions around college will dictate the course of their entire lives, their income, and their future happiness.
Read MoreI was at a holiday party recently with a white elephant gift exchange, and I saw the perfect gift for highly sensitive people (HSPs)--a giant red button with the word ‘no’ on it. When you pressed the button, it might say, ‘nope’ or ‘no, no, no, no, no!’ And I thought how amazing it would be for HSPs to be able to push a button that could set boundaries for them, instead of having to wade through all the guilt and worry and anguish around saying no.
Read MoreYes, it’s true--adolescence can be a time of self-centeredness. Developmentally, teens are wired to pull away from their families and gravitate toward their friends and peers, as they prepare to launch out into the world on their own. Biologically, this also makes sense because as human beings, we are social creatures and need other people to survive. So, if the family is no longer the primary source of support, friends and peers become exceedingly important, which then makes teens very self-conscious and focused on themselves to accomplish this significant developmental task.
Read MoreDear sensitive one, do you have those days where you wake up worrying? Like, before you even open your eyes, the worry is taking over? “Ugh, there’s that meeting that I’m dreading.” “I have so much to do; how am I going to get through it all?” “I really wish I didn’t have to face that conversation.” “How am I going to manage?” Your stomach gets tied in knots or the butterflies take over, and your whole body feels tense before your feet even hit the floor.
Read More“Please put your phone down, and look at me!” “You’re gonna walk into something if you keep staring at your phone like that!” “Believe me, you are not going to die if you don’t have wifi all weekend.”
Any of these sound familiar? Have you found yourself saying similar things to your own teen? It’s such a common challenge. How do we help our kids appreciate technology without becoming all consumed by it?
My favorite part of being a therapist is the transformation that I am privileged to witness in each of my clients. The change or growth doesn’t always occur in a positive direction--sometimes people really don’t want to change--but they need support anyway and deserve it. I have so much respect for the therapeutic process that I really invest myself in determining if I am capable of caring for the specific mental health needs of each potential client.
Read MoreDear friend, the answer to this is that you ARE different AND you are not the only one. Highly sensitive people comprise about 15-20% of the population in any given culture or society. Wherever you live, with whomever you interact, roughly 1/5 of the people you encounter will also be sensitive.
Then, why does it feel so lonely?
This is for the parents who are struggling with their teens’ developing and changing identities and for those who really just want their teens to bypass adolescence entirely and move straight into adulthood.
We hear you! Adolescence is a TOUGH time.