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Thrive Therapy & Counseling provides high quality therapy to Highly Sensitive People and to kids, teens or adults struggling with anxiety, depression or self-esteem.

Blog

This blog is written by a therapist in midtown Sacramento and focuses on the concerns and struggles of highly sensitive people (HSPs) and of kids, teens and adults struggling with depression, anxiety or just trying to figure out what they want for themselves.  There's help and hope through counseling and therapy!

Filtering by Category: highly sensitive person

"You're too sensitive!" How Our Sensitivity May Be Used Against Us

Ivy Griffin

I can’t count how many times I’ve received unsolicited commentary about my sensitivity, especially when attempting to assert a boundary or need. Historically, these comments have come from someone I had some sort of ongoing relationship with but only came up in response to my need or boundary. It’s almost as if my “sensitivity” wasn’t a problem until that very moment. Unfortunately, this experience is all too familiar to many of us. I’d like to offer a different perspective than the problem-saturated, blaming point-of-view we’re used to and hopefully create a little relief or at least clarity for readers. 

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HSPs, Anxiety, and CEN

Ivy Griffin

Are you a highly sensitive person who struggles with chronic, free floating anxiety and tension? Do you also struggle to identify what's causing your anxiety? Perhaps you don't recognize that you're anxious but feel compelled to stay busy as much as possible. These might be the effects of childhood emotional neglect, also known as CEN. 

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How to Compassionately Explore the Different Parts of the Self as a HSP

Ivy Griffin

Exploring different parts of yourself as a highly sensitive person (HSP) requires a compassionate and gentle approach. HSPs often experience emotions and sensations more intensely, which can make self-exploration a deeply enriching yet potentially overwhelming experience. What does it mean to explore different parts of the self? Let’s break it down in a more comprehensible way. We, as humans feel a spectrum of emotions, have the ability to have coherent narratives and are conscious of our ability to connect with others. As an HSP you may have a heightened awareness of your emotions, thoughts, and energetic connection to others, which can then make it overwhelming when multiple experiences are happening at once. You may be hyper-aware of your inner critic, doubt, or empathetic nature. Taking the observer role when feelings, thoughts, or sensations come up will help to determine what part of the self is showing up (i.e. part that's judgmental, part that is hopeful, part that is powerless, and the list goes on!). Know that self-exploration is a lifelong process and with communal support, self-compassion, radical acceptance, and self trust, it can allow for a gentle journey. 

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A Healing Connection: How Pets Can be a Source of Comfort for HSPs with Anxiety

Ivy Griffin

As a Highly Sensitive Person, it is common to find yourself overwhelmed by everyday experiences in our highly stimulating and demanding world. While your empathic nature allows you to connect deeply with others, it also makes you susceptible to anxiety and emotional overload. However, there’s a furry four-legged (or scaly, feathered, winged, finned) companion you can always turn to - your pet. Our pets offer much more than just companionship; they can be a source of comfort and healing for HSPs struggling with anxiety. If you’re an HSP with a pet you adore or an HSP considering bringing a pet into your life, this blog is for you! 

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The Art of Detachment

Ivy Griffin

How did that make you feel? What’s coming up for you now? How did you manage that situation? 

If you’ve been to therapy even once before, chances are you’ve encountered one or all of the phrases above. And that makes sense. A competent therapist is going to draw attention to your strengths, your thoughts and physical sensations, your feelings. Common denominator: You.

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Thinking Traps and Temperance

Ivy Griffin

When faced with the experience of being highly sensitive, confronted with all kinds of stimuli and narratives regarding how one “should” be in this world, it might be easy for HSPs to find themselves down the rabbit hole of cognitive distortions, a.k.a. thinking traps. These thinking traps present as an irrational or exaggerated thought pattern and when employed often enough can contribute to depression and anxiety. There are many thinking traps that can get us lost in a maze and lead us to believe there’s no way out of our negative circumstances. It would be difficult to name them all here today but there are some that I confront regularly in my practice and are worth acknowledging.

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Getting More Out of Your Down-Time

Ivy Griffin

“I feel like I don’t do enough to be as tired as I am”. “I did nothing all weekend and I’m still exhausted!” “Why do I need so much rest?” Sound familiar? You’re not alone. Many people are frustrated and confused by how depleted they continue to feel after down-time. They want to feel more energized and refreshed but can’t seem to get the restorative rest they need. Let’s look at why that might be!

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Coping with Hot Weather as an HSP

Ivy Griffin

The hot summer months can be a challenging time for highly sensitive people (HSPs). Though it’s only spring, those of us who are sensitive to heat are already dreading the increasingly hot days (and nights). With the hot weather and longer days, life can feel extra overwhelming. Even the most seemingly innocuous activities can leave you feeling overwhelmed and drained. Here are some tips for coping with rising temperatures as an HSP: 

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Why am I so bothered by things that don’t affect other people?

Ivy Griffin

I often hear the frustration and sadness and defeat in the voices of highly sensitive people (HSP) when they share how they become more emotional, overwhelmed, shut down, or worn out in situations that don’t seem to affect other people. This difference can make HSPs feel like outsiders, like there must be something wrong with them because they are “abnormal” compared to everyone around them. 

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Appreciating Our Sensitivity

Ivy Griffin

Being highly sensitive definitely has its ups and downs. In a culture that often devalues vulnerability, we can get the message that sensitivity is undesirable or “weak” and we should try our best to suppress it. But as I always say, there are two sides to everything. Let’s look at the other side of the coin and see if it can help us to appreciate our sensitivity.

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Parenting while being an HSP: A Survival Guide

Ivy Griffin

What are some of the characteristics of HSPs? We don't like loud noises, making mistakes, we need reassurance, are easily startled, it takes us longer to adjust to significant life changes, we feel overwhelmed when there’s a lot going on at once, and other’s moods deeply affect us. We also have strong emotional attunement and empathy. We care more! Being  a parent means there’s constant chaos, rushing, less time for basic needs like eating/sleeping/bathing much, limited time for self-care, huge changes, hourly and persistent loud noises. When challenges are not addressed, this can lead to emotional reactivity, guilt, struggles with anxiety/depression, feeling lonely/disconnected and low self-value.

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How Judgment & Avoidance Can Lead to Overwhelm

Ivy Griffin

Do you experience cycles of emotional overwhelm? Does it feel like things will be running relatively smoothly and then all-of-a-sudden you’re slammed with anxiety and overwhelm and spend the next few days or weeks trying to recover? You might be thinking “Why can’t I just be normal all the time?” Well I’d like to offer some perspective on what might be contributing to this cycle and how you might break it. 

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You're Not Alone

Ivy Griffin

I often hear from highly sensitive people (HSPs) how different and alone they feel. “I’m too sensitive,” “I need to grow a thicker skin,” “Why can’t I just let it go like everyone else?” are common refrains. Such beliefs often stem from a lifetime of conscious and unconscious messages from well-meaning and not-so-well-meaning people about how there’s something wrong with the way you are. And, the reality is--highly sensitive people are not the norm. We know this because research has found that 15-20% of people in any given population in any given culture carry the personality trait of being highly sensitive. 

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Caring for Our Sensitivity During the Holidays

Ivy Griffin

Don't get me wrong; I like the holidays. Or at least most of what the holidays are about. But sometimes they can be somewhat overwhelming. I like Christmas music, but hearing it everywhere 24/7 for two months is too much for me. I also like holiday parties. But seven family gatherings, five friend parties and three work shebangs in one month can weigh me down.

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The Social Hangover

Ivy Griffin

Imagine that you’re at a party or gathering at a friend’s house. As a highly sensitive person, you may have felt some anxiety or dread about going to the party and having to make small talk. Some of the folks in attendance are friends, and you gravitate toward talking to them. But, you notice a couple of people who hang back and don’t seem to know many others. Your empathy kicks in, and you decide to go chat with them to help them feel more welcome. While you’re talking, another person or two joins in the conversation and brings up a political issue you care about deeply. As you passionately discuss the matter, you add in how you cannot understand anyone who thinks otherwise. The person you initially approached quietly says, “I disagree” and wanders away.

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