We can find a lot of information out there about self-care routines from planning your weekly exercise regimen to what skin care steps to follow every day to how to begin meditating. While all of this can be helpful, we don’t often talk about how to match self-care to our current emotional state, and as sensitive souls, it can be really important to check in with ourselves regularly about how we’re feeling and to engage in practices to take care of ourselves that meet these needs.
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Happy New Year, dear HSPs! I wish you all the best that this year can bring, even as I know that we continue to live in a difficult time. As we embark on 2021, we may have conflicting feelings of hope, frustration, overwhelm, uncertainty, anger, excitement, or even despair. While there are some indicators of change for the coming year, there’s still a LOT we don’t know and can’t really plan for.
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We all know what a difficult year this has been. Our lives have changed in some ways we didn’t even realize was possible, our privilege or reminders of our lack thereof have been revealed over and over again, and the losses continue to add up. As highly sensitive people (HSPs), we may feel grief, confusion, anger, disappointment, frustration, sadness, disgust, overwhelm, and heartbreak. It’s a lot to cope with, and of course, we feel all of this very deeply and intensely.
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We all know that being highly sensitive can really drain our energy. It makes sense that anyone who is highly attuned to their environment and the feelings of others would feel exhausted after absorbing so much sensory information. But, one of the things I’ve been paying attention to recently is the balance of input versus output. We take in all this information all day every day, but where does it go?
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Do you ever feel like you just give and give and never receive the acknowledgement or the gratitude you deserve? Do you continually pour your heart and soul into what you do only to find you have nothing left for yourself?
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These are such tough times we’re continuing to live in, especially for sensitive souls who absorb so much of what happens around us. I keep saying this again and again, yet it’s still true. Those of us in California have been even more impacted in the past month with the horrific wildfires and terrible air quality. As someone who finds a lot of solace in getting outdoors and moving, it’s been incredibly challenging. It can feel like we’re on house arrest--can’t go outside and can’t go inside anywhere. Damned if we do or don’t.
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Do you have those days when you just do NOT want to do all the things? When every single part of you just wants to stay in bed or curl up with a book or escape to the beach and not do one. damn. thing. that you’re ‘supposed’ to?
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As highly sensitive people, we likely already have a strong appreciation for the beauty of the natural world. We tend to be lovers of animals, plants, art, beauty and to have strong convictions about protecting and preserving the environment and the other creatures around us. These hard-wired sensitivities and appreciations can serve us well during this time.
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My heart and body feel heavy just typing the words. I’ve been putting off writing this article, dreading the topic and the mind-body-soul despair/fatigue/overwhelm/heartbreak (do any of these words come near enough?) that accompany grief. Yet, as highly sensitive people, at this moment in time, we may be grieving about So. So. Much.
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Life continues to feel very strange as the pandemic goes on, and there’s so much uncertainty about what to expect. It’s hard to plan for three days from now, much less 3 months into the future. This is especially tough if you’re a planner, like me. I love scheduling events, get-togethers, and travels to look forward to and daydream about. While I have made a few plans for July and beyond, I’m not sure if they’ll actually happen or what the world will look like by that time. It’s hard to truly look forward to things when we also feel a sense of heaviness and know that so much is out of our control.
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This is such a bizarre and difficult time. I debated about whether to be one more source writing about COVID-19 and “shelter in place,” but I realized how could I not? All of our lives have changed dramatically in the last 4 weeks and continue to be impacted daily. It’s hard to believe that even when I wrote last month’s article, life was mostly proceeding as “normal.” Now, for the time being, our lives have shifted in ways most of us would have never imagined, and it makes sense that this change colors everything currently.
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Rest and downtime are essential for all humans, whether or not we get that message in our fast-paced, multi-tasking culture. No being can be focused, alert, and active all the time. Rest provides the yin to the yang of busyness. It offers us balance and restoration so that we can resume all that we need to do.
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Are you ever challenged to find things you are thankful for? I know I sometimes struggle with this. It can be hard to pinpoint the good in life when your mind is swimming with to do lists, hurt feelings, and self-doubt. On top of that, highly sensitive people are often inundated with stimuli, which can feel really overwhelming. And, if you’re already feeling down, it can be hard and even annoying to focus on gratitude. Writing a list of 3-5 things you are thankful for might even seem to trivialize and minimize the intensity of your emotions. But despite these challenges, I want to encourage HSPs to give the practice of gratitude a try. Why?
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As highly sensitive people (HSPs), we tend to question ourselves a lot. We think and wonder and analyze. Is this the best job for me? Am I happy? Am I a good parent/sibling/friend/partner/colleague? What’s the meaning of life? And of my life, in particular? Should I be doing _____ more? Am I with the right partner? Is this how I want to act with my family? Should I be doing things differently? Am I on the right track with my life??
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I was at a holiday party recently with a white elephant gift exchange, and I saw the perfect gift for highly sensitive people (HSPs)--a giant red button with the word ‘no’ on it. When you pressed the button, it might say, ‘nope’ or ‘no, no, no, no, no!’ And I thought how amazing it would be for HSPs to be able to push a button that could set boundaries for them, instead of having to wade through all the guilt and worry and anguish around saying no.
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