2131 Capitol Ave. Ste 206
Sacramento, CA 95816
US
916-287-3430
hello@thrivetherapyandcounseling.com
Thrive Therapy & Counseling provides high quality therapy to Highly Sensitive People and to kids, teens or adults struggling with anxiety, depression or self-esteem.
This blog is written by a therapist in midtown Sacramento and focuses on the concerns and struggles of highly sensitive people (HSPs) and of kids, teens and adults struggling with depression, anxiety or just trying to figure out what they want for themselves. There's help and hope through counseling and therapy!
Filtering by Category: highly sensitive person
My heart and body feel heavy just typing the words. I’ve been putting off writing this article, dreading the topic and the mind-body-soul despair/fatigue/overwhelm/heartbreak (do any of these words come near enough?) that accompany grief. Yet, as highly sensitive people, at this moment in time, we may be grieving about So. So. Much.
Read MoreLife continues to feel very strange as the pandemic goes on, and there’s so much uncertainty about what to expect. It’s hard to plan for three days from now, much less 3 months into the future. This is especially tough if you’re a planner, like me. I love scheduling events, get-togethers, and travels to look forward to and daydream about. While I have made a few plans for July and beyond, I’m not sure if they’ll actually happen or what the world will look like by that time. It’s hard to truly look forward to things when we also feel a sense of heaviness and know that so much is out of our control.
Read MoreThis is such a bizarre and difficult time. I debated about whether to be one more source writing about COVID-19 and “shelter in place,” but I realized how could I not? All of our lives have changed dramatically in the last 4 weeks and continue to be impacted daily. It’s hard to believe that even when I wrote last month’s article, life was mostly proceeding as “normal.” Now, for the time being, our lives have shifted in ways most of us would have never imagined, and it makes sense that this change colors everything currently.
Read MoreRest and downtime are essential for all humans, whether or not we get that message in our fast-paced, multi-tasking culture. No being can be focused, alert, and active all the time. Rest provides the yin to the yang of busyness. It offers us balance and restoration so that we can resume all that we need to do.
Read MoreAre you ever challenged to find things you are thankful for? I know I sometimes struggle with this. It can be hard to pinpoint the good in life when your mind is swimming with to do lists, hurt feelings, and self-doubt. On top of that, highly sensitive people are often inundated with stimuli, which can feel really overwhelming. And, if you’re already feeling down, it can be hard and even annoying to focus on gratitude. Writing a list of 3-5 things you are thankful for might even seem to trivialize and minimize the intensity of your emotions. But despite these challenges, I want to encourage HSPs to give the practice of gratitude a try. Why?
Read MoreAs highly sensitive people (HSPs), we tend to question ourselves a lot. We think and wonder and analyze. Is this the best job for me? Am I happy? Am I a good parent/sibling/friend/partner/colleague? What’s the meaning of life? And of my life, in particular? Should I be doing _____ more? Am I with the right partner? Is this how I want to act with my family? Should I be doing things differently? Am I on the right track with my life??
Read MoreI was at a holiday party recently with a white elephant gift exchange, and I saw the perfect gift for highly sensitive people (HSPs)--a giant red button with the word ‘no’ on it. When you pressed the button, it might say, ‘nope’ or ‘no, no, no, no, no!’ And I thought how amazing it would be for HSPs to be able to push a button that could set boundaries for them, instead of having to wade through all the guilt and worry and anguish around saying no.
Read MoreDear sensitive one, do you have those days where you wake up worrying? Like, before you even open your eyes, the worry is taking over? “Ugh, there’s that meeting that I’m dreading.” “I have so much to do; how am I going to get through it all?” “I really wish I didn’t have to face that conversation.” “How am I going to manage?” Your stomach gets tied in knots or the butterflies take over, and your whole body feels tense before your feet even hit the floor.
Read MoreDear friend, the answer to this is that you ARE different AND you are not the only one. Highly sensitive people comprise about 15-20% of the population in any given culture or society. Wherever you live, with whomever you interact, roughly 1/5 of the people you encounter will also be sensitive.
Then, why does it feel so lonely?
Your heart starts pounding. Your muscles tense. You get hot and start to sweat a little. It’s hard to think straight. You just want to get out of there ASAP. You, my sensitive friend, are in a moment of overwhelm.
Being overwhelmed is no fun for anyone, least of all highly sensitive people. When we human beings feel completely overloaded, our brains and bodies instantly go into survival mode.
Have you ever:
Found yourself avoiding crowds of people?
Felt bothered or agitated by certain sounds--like chewing, a neighbor’s TV blaring, a repetitive drip when you’re trying to sleep, even if they didn’t bother other people around you?
Wished you could just hide at home in bed?
Struggled in open workspaces?
Hated fluorescent lighting?
Had a hard time focusing or concentrating if there’s any background noise?
Found yourself being jumpy when a siren goes by?
As sensitive folks, we tend to be excellent friends, partners, children, parents, employees, colleagues, neighbors. If your immediate reaction is, “I’m not sure that applies to me,” you’re probably being too hard on yourself. But, you’re not alone as many highly sensitive people (HSPs) tend to undervalue what they offer to others. We HSPs are wonderfully empathic and do such a good job of putting ourselves in others’ shoes that the people in our lives usually really appreciate us. HSPs tend to be great listeners, wonderful problem-solvers, and gentle advice-givers. When an HSP tunes in to another person, that person really knows they’re being heard and seen. And, this doesn’t happen a lot in our busy culture, so, people really like this connectedness they feel from sensitive souls.
Read MoreImagine that you’re at a party or gathering at a friend’s house. As a highly sensitive person, you may have felt some anxiety or dread about going to the party and having to make small talk. Some of the folks in attendance are friends, and you gravitate toward talking to them. But, you notice a couple of people who hang back and don’t seem to know many others. Your empathy kicks in, and you decide to go chat with them to help them feel more welcome. While you’re talking, another person or two joins in the conversation and brings up a political issue you care about deeply. As you passionately discuss the matter, you add in how you cannot understand anyone who thinks otherwise. The person you initially approached quietly says, “I disagree” and wanders away.
Read MoreThis sounds like advice from an eight ball, right? Or, from some sage old monk. Funny how words of wisdom can seem profound and trite at the same time. This little nugget actually came to me from an unexpected source when I was in college. See, I’ve always had some fondness for adventure, and at the end of my junior year, I convinced two of my girlfriends to go with me on a 3 week trip through the southwest with the student Outdoor Center. The trip involved some hiking and camping, which we all loved, and a lot of rock-climbing and mountain biking, which none of us had ever done before.
Read MoreHave I mentioned that I hate small talk? I can handle about 30 seconds of it, and then . . . I’m boooored. The meaningless banter makes me wish I was at home reading a good book. But, give me some depth, catch my interest on a topic, go beyond the ordinary chatter, and I’m hooked. I love stories SO much. I could listen for hours as a story unfolds. Yes, it’s one of the reasons I became a therapist, and it’s one of the gifts of therapy—we very quickly move past the shallow small talk and dig into what’s real and what matters. As a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), this stirs my soul. I come alive with such deep and meaningful conversations.
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