Many of the folks I have the privilege of working with struggle with the belief that being queer is ‘not normal,’ is something to hide or be ashamed of, or is flat out wrong. These messages are rooted in societal fear and apathy, and say more about the lack of collective compassion and acceptance than most anything else. These external beliefs can then form internal beliefs commonly known as internalized homophobia. What is internalized homophobia? Internalized homophobia is the negative beliefs and feelings about one's own sexual orientation that can develop as a result of societal stigma, discrimination, or negative experiences. Working through internalized homophobia can be a challenging process, but it's an important step toward self-acceptance, self-love, and living authentically as an LGBTQ+ individual. Here are some steps to help you work through it…
Read More
What's interesting is that even in our worry about whether or not we belong--we belong. All people have these concerns. All people want to be accepted and understood and precisely because it matters so much, it will sometimes keep us up at night. We will cry out in the depths of our loneliness, "Do people like me?"
Read More
Do you ever feel frustrated when you're trying to figure out where the voice of your inner critic came from? Or why it's so strong? Perhaps your therapist has even asked you this in sessions and you repeatedly draw a blank. This can be so frustrating when we're trying to make sense of things and find some relief.
Read More
Have you ever thought "why is it so hard to love myself?" Many of us find it easier to demonstrate our love for others than love for ourselves. But why? What is it about loving ourselves that makes it so difficult?
Read More
What? Self-compassion? As soon as you read the word, how many of you thought, “Sounds like some touchy-feely, mumbo jumbo phrase to make everybody feel better with really earning it”? That message is EXACTLY what society tells us to think. Our culture excels at teaching us to be critical, exacting, perfectionistic and to promptly lash into ourselves in any moment when we don’t live up to these impossible standards. “Pull yourself up by your bootstraps!” “Don’t be a crybaby.” “Be all that you can be.” “Always do your best.” Sheesh, I feel my shoulders sagging under all this weight just by writing these messages out! It makes for an exhausting and harsh life when you adhere to such beliefs.
For us HSPs, we’re even more susceptible to taking what others teach us to heart and of reaaaally carrying the load of such messages.
Read More