Have you struggled with not liking yourself or feeling good about who you are - maybe for a long time? Is it hard for you to see your strengths? Do you worry that other people are so much smarter, funnier, better, or more interesting than you?

It hurts so much when we’re struggling with low self-esteem. It can cause us to doubt ourselves and every decision we make, which really doesn’t help if we’re trying to figure out a next step in our work, family, or personal lives.

Our therapists get how hard this is and would love to help.

highly sensitive people (hsps), self-esteem, and self identity

Have you been told you need to:

• stop being so sensitive

• toughen up

• let things go

• grow a thicker skin

• stop crying

• shake it off

• not let things get to you so much

• stop overanalyzing everything

You’ve probably heard these or similar phrases repeatedly throughout your life. Uh-huh, yep. Us too. These are really common messages highly sensitive people (hsps) or empaths hear from friends, family, and all kinds of well-intentioned and some not-so-well-intentioned people. No wonder you’re not feeling so good about who you are!

THESE MESSAGES are meant to make YOU BELIEVE THERE’S SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU. they say that you’re broken and NEED TO BE FIXED.

But, it’s not true. Our therapists know otherwise. We’d love to help you embrace your strengths and refine your tools to deal with the challenges that life throws at you. Just reach out.

quarter life crisis, midlife crisis, and self-esteem

Ever felt like you were going through an identity crisis? Or wonder “Who am I”? Like you don't know who you are anymore? Or, feel like you've lost yourself? Do you do what other people want you to do, without stopping to think about what's important to you? Are you questioning what gives your life meaning and feeling like you need to make a change?

We’ve been there! Multiple times, as a matter of fact. These sneaky little crises can pop up at different points throughout our lives—maybe as a twenty-something or thirty-something, maybe in middle age. Going through a life change or transition can also cause these questions to rear their heads.

people of color and self-esteem

We live in a white supremacy culture. We’re inundated with a million messages before we can even speak complete sentences about how being white is better and preferred, which shows up in study after study of how children make choices and interact with the concept of race. Implicit and downright explicit biases, harassment, and discrimination are present in our lives constantly.

And they take a HUGE toll.

we struggle to have the words for how hard it is to be bipoc in the u.s.

Police still kill and arrest people of color at alarmingly higher rates than their white counterparts. Statistically, people of color make less income, have less generational wealth because of systemic discrimination and abuse, and are jailed at disproportionate rates. It makes us want to scream, cry, never get out of bed. We question - how is this the country we live in?

It’s awful and absurd.

And it’s reality day in and day out. How could your self-esteem not be affected??

we see you. we hate that it’s so hard. We’re a safe place for you.

Women’s self-esteem and Self value

Yes, we still live in a world where cis and trans women make less money than men for the same type of work. We’re only 50 years out from women being ALLOWED TO OPEN THEIR OWN BANK ACCOUNTS without a man’s signature. (I’m looking at you - Equal Credit Opportunity Act of 1974.) Again and again, women who work full-time are found to do far more than 50% of household chores compared with male counterparts, and women tend to carry more of the relational and emotional burden in their families and their relationships with male partners.

need we say more?

No wonder women struggle!! We could write essays on this topic, especially since we haven’t begun to address the messages in our society about what women should and shouldn't be, how we should or should not look, what size our bodies should be, who even HAS FREAKIN’ CONTROL OVER OUR BODIES - and now we’re ready to scream. And, we haven’t even mentioned the vast amount of conflicting and unrelenting expectations from society, your culture, or your family.

there is so much that’s wrong. and it affects how we feel about ourselves.

women, we see you, and we’re here for you.

Self-esteem and lgbtqia+ communities

Alas, it’s a too familiar story - the 1 step forward, 5 steps back when trying to make progress. In this country, LGBT+ freedoms and rights are being challenged or taken away on a much too regular basis. (Then again, isn’t having anything taken away too much?) It can feel utterly unsafe to be your true self in some spaces or even in whole states or regions. On top of this, we live in a heteronormative society that sometimes doesn’t even have the language, tolerate - much less accept, or make the space for who you are.

It’s really Hard. and scary. and infuriating.

There can be physical threats to your safety, not to mention the toll all these societal messages, biases, and discrimination take on your emotional and mental health. It’s exhausting.

Of course, how you feel about yourself is impacted by this world you live in.

We see you, and we hold a safe space for you.

Self-understanding

Do you feel stuck? Are you wondering why you keep making the same mistakes? Feel like the family you grew up in might (or definitely) has something to do with why you keep acting this way? Do you just want to figure out what the heck is going on?

Several psychological theories point to insight and self-awareness as the first steps toward healing. Frequently, this increased desire to understand yourself arises for twenty- or thirty-somethings, but it can also come up at any point in life. Sometimes gaining such insight involves delving into the present moment, and sometimes that awareness stems from deeply exploring our pasts, including how our family, friends, community, culture, etc. may have shaped us. We believe strongly that the more we understand who we are, how we got to be this way and why we do the things we do, the more we can play an active part in keeping the parts we like, altering those that don’t quite fit us, and altogether changing the parts we don’t like.

addressing a lack of self confidence in therapy

When we don’t see or recognize our strengths and abilities, life is harder. You don’t have the confidence to work toward your goals and dreams. You make different decisions because you don’t believe that you’re capable, which can even create an awful self-fulfilling prophecy where others see you as less capable too.

On top of this, you have an inner critic that bullies you 24/7.

It’s miserable. We don’t want you to have to live like this anymore. We’d love to help you see yourself as we see you.

Counseling for Low Self-Esteem in Sacramento and online in ca

In counseling, we can work together to unfold the story of who you are and to explore who you want to become. We can support you in recognizing and honoring your strengths and building tools like self-compassion to help you through the hard stuff that life throws your way.

As you start to understand yourself better and to recognize those pesky tendencies or patterns that cause problems, you can take charge of your life and begin setting goals, practicing new skills, and making intentional choices about the path you want your life to take starting right now. You can embrace who you are and where you want to go.

Our therapists would love to help.